Welcome 2015!

Here we are at the start of 2015 and it's been a busy few weeks. I was not lying when I said I would probably not post until after the New Year, and here we are! For me, the past two weeks have been extremely relaxing and a means to catch up on life. I thoroughly embraced each moment with friends and my little family, specifically Maddy, and took my camera out a bit more to experiment and play. I was even approached about doing some portraits, as in a gig, and was thrilled, but am nervous.

It became a domino affect of thoughts....

I started pondering the possibilities of owning a photography business on the side of every other hat I wear. That led me to looking up $1200 lenses that I "need" or a cool newer, faster camera that is close to a small car loan. Which resulted in me, measuring myself up to the best of the best on the internet and thinking...Holy cow?!

Do I really have what it takes? Am I even that good.  Will I be that  good? Where do I even begin? What will people expect from me? Will I capture those true moments or will those moments  be canned?


Then, I think I am okay at what I do. Far from great. Far from perfect.

I think I have come a long way from day one, two years ago, but I also know I have a lot of practicing to do.

So, that's what I  have done the past few months since my last post....practiced...

And practiced some more...

I am proud of my little model and all that she allows me to do with her, even if it is sometimes bargaining her with "a special treat" or bribery, whatever way you want to look at it. But I get candid moments that are irreplacable...

Going backward down the slide

Engaged with her tablet

Still fits into her 1st Halloween Costume

Helping Baby up in her playhouse

Learning pool

When she saw Santa come down the street of Sequim

Playing with her babies outside

Brave enough to go beyond an "air hug"

Hot cocoa

Taking baby for a walk

Looking at the river below

Stopping to check out a hole in the bridge

How much further, mom?

Ballet

 I get to freeze time...So it makes me anxious when someone sees/hears I am a photographer, which I can proudly label myself as, and wants me to capture the moments in their own lives that I capture in my own. That scares me because I can't guarantee these moments since I am not intimately connected or invested in their life story as I am with my own. Granted, I can craft some pretty awesome portraits and fine tune some beautiful pictures, but I cannot capture memories...not like these, not like mine.

I don't want to disappoint a client or friend, if the images don't come out the way they want them to. Maybe that is what holds me back from branching out a bit more to the world of possible business owner...

It's crossing my mind...

Am I good enough? Am I second guessing myself? Do I need more practice?

Practice is obvious. Practice is what makes anyone really good at anything. 

And the artist in me, the writer, the creative dreamer is the only critic that really needs to  debate with  the "Am I?" and the "What if's?"

                      

Maybe someday. Maybe 2015.