Mindless Meanderings of Schroedawg

Madelynne has reached the two month mark and routine has been established within the Schroeder household. At five weeks, I was beginning to second guess myself as a mom, wondering if I would ever get the hang of this. I felt like a juggler trying to balance planning for my college courses I’m teaching, continuously looking for full time work (Wyoming or Colorado would be very nice!!), working on my PhD, and being a mom.   I was awed by the constant give and take that stay at home mom’s deal with every day. It is not easy to stay at home. But it is also not easy to be a professional, working mom, as well. I am lucky to fall somewhere in the middle, yet I realize what a task it has been to find a sense of balance with all that is on my plate. In the past two months, I have taken away three graces in my time with Madelynne. The first of these is to go with the flow, which ties in with the idea of releasing my control over situations. I hate not knowing what the outcome or future wil...

Madelynne turns 1 month old in a few days and it is hard to believe that 4 weeks have gone by already. Brad and I constantly look at her and ask ourselves where the time went, as she has developed even more. Everyone told me to take it all in and enjoy each day as she continues to grow, as it will go by fast, so that is what I have been doing. When she nurses, I examine her little fingers and toes, as her fingers wrap securely around one of mine. I love the smooth, softness of her skin. When she has play time on her little activity mat, she is looking around and examining the world with wide-eye curiousity, fixating on a light, the cats, movement, a picture. When she dreams she does her dad’s infamous half-lip raise quiver, or the Elvis lip as I refer to it, smiles, twitches, frowns, scowls, sucks, breathes deep and rhythmically, moans and grunts, coos…all sorts of emotions that I wonder what exactly she is dreaming about. I mean, she hasn’t been around long enough to engage in experi...

Almost 3 weeks ago Brad and I officially became parents. Madelynne Elizabeth was born in the wee hours of the morning on August 15 th , 2011, weighing 8 lbs, 3 oz., and 19 inches in length. Words can’t even begin to describe the abundance of love I felt immediately toward this little miracle who was placed in my arms after I was able to go back to my room from recovery, after the c-section. The whole experience of giving birth is surreal in itself. One minute the life you created that was thriving inside of you, that you felt day in and day out, was now in your arms and real. Although there was this insurmountable amount of pain, (which is beyond description), it falls away as soon as that baby is placed in your arms. You forget everything because all you see is this tiny little person, whose fingers are wrapped around yours, and whose little heart is overflowing with the love from two parents who waited well over two years for this day. Madelynne is a blessing. After the surgery and...

Brad and I got into an argument on Saturday morning, as I huffed and puffed to try to reason with him through my rising blood pressure and anger, that making a baby is a lot harder than he would ever know, and how I was ready for her to be out, and he, as nonchalantly as a male reacts, argued, “It’s only nine months.” Seriously? That’s the basis for your argument? Not that I am ranting about the joyous miracle of creating life or the new adventure of mommy-hood, but is he that clueless? Does he not see the transformation that has taken course over the last 9 months and the frustrations it has caused me to no avail? He even rubbed my belly as if I were Buddha about to bestow him luck, and stated, “That thing is the size of a basketball now! Wow!” Great. Thanks for that. The transition into pregnancy is, how do I put this…overwhelming? Again, let me reiterate that I have had a very, smooth pregnancy. I haven’t been bombarded with the urge to hurl at the smell of foods or lack thereof. ...

 On July 4th, we went to a BBQ, where we were the youngest in attendance. Unfortunately, as much as I wanted to pig out and delve into the awesome display of potatoes salads, baked beans, and other scrumptious foods, I settled for just a hamburger, some veggies sans the dip, and my very own salsa and whole grain chips. As we literally baked in the sun, (my lovely legs got more burned than anticipated and I was smart to cover up my arms, shoulders, and chest), the ladies of the group kept asking about the baby and when she was due, etc. It hit me, then, that we were 8 weeks away and I said, "8 months." "Really? You're 8 months pregnant? You're so small!" was their response. I had to double take myself in the mirror a few times after this response when I stole away to the bathroom, but I think I'm huge.  In pondering these comments, I asked my doctor if I was progressing fine. She said I was measuring perfect and my weight is right on track, having only...

I love animals. I have loved animals ever since I was a child. Maybe it has something to do with my veterinarian parents and their devotion to caring for all animals. I am not sure. But what I do know is that I just love them. They each have their own unique personality. This blog is devoted to our animals, who are technically our family. We have four cats. Yes, we’re nuts. I may end up one day as the crazy cat lady, retired in my little log cabin up in Cooke City, with my 12 cats, two golden retrievers, and visiting pet moose, but the reason for the four we have now is because I could not see myself turning them away. We acquired these four strays when we were living in Florida, at our little apartment, early summer of 2004. I had just moved Tiger, my old-timer cat from childhood, to Florida, and we were a happy little threesome until fate directed us to scurrying balls of black racing underneath house in front of us. Upon further investigation, we found five kittens, flea ridden, di...

As I was sitting, yesterday, getting my blood drawn 4x in 3 hours, starving,   to determine my glucose level and whether or not I have gestational diabetes, I kept thinking, holy cow manure---10 more weeks and our little bug will be here! I thought about the wonder of life and what a little miracle she is, that took Brad and me a year and half to create. And, despite the circumstances in our life, how graced I am by God to have this little bundle of joy to welcome in late August. No matter what I am going through emotionally, our little girl will always, and forever, be the one thing that makes me happy every day, even when I will be annoyed, overwhelmed, or completely exhausted. Progressing into the 30 th week, I have been thinking about the milestones in my pregnancy. Like when I told Brad, two days after Christmas, with two wrapped up pregnancy tests with the double lines highlighting the obvious positive, and how excited he was   (at first, wondering why I would wrap up ...